A divorce with a difference

A divorce with a difference

The end of a marriage can be very painful. Divorce proceedings can make this even worse.

You may start to see your partner as the enemy and the divorce as a fight. You might feel angry and torn by your feelings of loss and powerlessness. If this is the case, it will become more and more difficult to imagine an end to the divorce and being able to build a future for yourself after all is said and done. But it doesn’t have to be like this. A number of experts in the field of divorce have searched for a better alternative. This has resulted in the development of the Collaborative Divorce Model.

The advantages of collaborative divorce

There are many advantages to a collaborative divorce. The most important characteristic of a collaborative divorce is that the divorce is arranged by agreement and therefore without going to court. The process can be concluded much faster than in traditional divorce proceedings, which often deteriorate into a messy divorce. It is also a cheaper option. A collaborative divorce takes place calmly and openly while showing respect for one another. This results in permanent solutions that you can both stand firmly behind and where there is space for personal wishes and interests.

More than mediation

As opposed to mediation, both partners have their own lawyer. Someone who takes care of your interests, but who will not fight the father or the mother of your children. There is a third person, a coach, who manages the process and who provides space for the emotions which need to be expressed, and possibly a fourth person, a financial expert, to deal with the financial aspects of the whole case. If necessary, another coach is assigned to the team especially for the children. In this way, all the required expertise is brought together to conclude a divorce in a respectful, efficient and permanent manner.

How does it work?

Meetings are held with the team, consisting of both ex-partners, the lawyers and experts, during which information is exchanged and needs and expectations can be expressed. This is carried out in a transparent and reasonable manner. It is important to keep all lines of communication open. It is only possible to resolve problem areas if these are discussed.

What if we cannot reach a solution?

There is a small chance of this happening. The professionals are continuously focused on finding solutions. Litigation costs much more, in a material and immaterial sense. If a collaborative divorce is not successful, mediation can most often also be ruled out as an option. If a collaborative divorce is brought to an end, all participants withdraw and the partners must engage other lawyers and if necessary other experts.

We want to separate but we are not married. Can we also have a collaborative divorce?

Yes, that is possible, most certainly if there are children involved. It is also important in that case that custody, maintenance and the care arrangement are arranged to everyone's satisfaction without the children being adversely affected. A parenting plan is also mandatory if you are not married.